


Climate Change

by esteefee



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Movie Fusion, Crack, Gen, Team
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-12
Updated: 2013-07-12
Packaged: 2017-12-19 06:03:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/880296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/esteefee/pseuds/esteefee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on recent SyFy movie; the team is in dire peril!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Climate Change

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mischief5](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mischief5/gifts).



"'Just a little tornado,' he says," John said, firing off a couple more rounds. "'Won't even come near the city,' he says." John's P-90 jammed, and he used it as a blunt object for a quick second while he backed away. "Ha." He wiped the blood and seawater from his eyes then freed the action on his weapon.

"How-how the hell was I supposed to predict _this_?" Rodney yelled, sounding semi-hysterical as he worked to open the balcony doors behind them.

"Scientists predict all sorts of stuff." Okay, maybe not this, necessarily. John fired until he was out of ammo, and then went back to using the P-90 as a bat. Finally the fucker went down. "I mean, it's science."

Rodney let out an indignant howl. "Oh, yes, because in the natural order of events _sharks_ are quite usually sucked up by a _tornado_ and dropped on our heads! A verifiable sharknado—it's in all the climatology texts—"

"Okay, okay, you've got a point—shit!" John was in a little bit of trouble, what with yet another shark squirming its way toward him, but just then Ronon came running over with his machete thing and hacked straight through the middle of its skull.

"Thanks," John said. Also, yuck.

"No problem; nice little one," Ronon said. "Be good eating later, I bet."

John pulled his Glock and turned toward Teyla, whom he saw was driving a bantos rod through the eyeball of the biggest megalodon yet. 

"Teyla?" John said weakly.

"Yes," she said, using the butt of her P-90 to drive the rod home. "I'm quite fond of fish."

The megalodon gave a huge, shuddering jerk, and then twitched into stillness.

"Well, all right." John scraped the blood and fish brains from his tac vest and turned toward Rodney, who was also splattered with fish guts and looking more than a little wild-eyed. He scowled at John and then fiddled with the controls on the damaged door once more, which finally gave a creaking groan and started to jerk open. It made it about a foot before it gave up the ghost, but that was enough for John and Ronon to get a grip and heave it just that much further, until they could all slip through.

"Well, kids—who's up for some fish sticks?"

"I will kill you, Sheppard, I swear," Rodney said. "The beauty is, you won't even see it coming—"

"You mean like a sharknado?"

Okay, he deserved that bruise. But it was totally worth it.

 

_End._

**Author's Note:**

> [More on Sharknado](http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=iwsqFR5bh6Q)! [Dive in](https://twitter.com/search?q=%23Sharknado&src=hash) at your own risk. :D


End file.
